I spent last night and the early hours of yesterday morning in the company of the Windows XP Home Edition installer. In order for the reader to understand why I might like to deprive myself of stimulation and sleep at this time of the morning I must take you back to 180^2 days ago.
I was running Windows XP Home Edition. On this particular day, a sizable proportion of my collection of beas, which I graciously provided a rent-free, warm home inside the case of my computer, decided they were dirty dirty fascists, the rebel beas apparently wanted to thwart my attempts to rule this planet.
My computer, loyal only to my regime, protected me from the infidels by presenting me with a blue screen containing the words CORRUPT_HIVE.
I was pissed, my insect minions had the audacity to turn against me, something had to be done, no minion could ever disobey me and live.
My shrimp cannon was out of order, so I instructed my computer to annihilate anything on the surface of the metal platter on which the beas maintained their homes.
After the automated genocide was complete, I installed Windows Server 2003, and ordered more beas. Windows Server 2003 is generally used by corporations, I figured corporate-minded beas would be far more obedient .
The only problem is that Windows Server 2003 is expensive, I being the cash-strapped future ruler of the universe that I am, can only afford the 180-day trial version of the software, which was due to die shortly.
One can not be expected to stop one’s planes for global domination every 180 days, I could use Windows XP Professional, which I know from experience is a superb Bea-controller, however it wouldn’t be legal on that particular computer, and we don’t need people investigating our evil activities do we.
I am now back to the domesticated beas I originally purged, they took some convincing, but for now it seams they are willing to obey my orders.